The world-renowned investor told the old man he had tummy trouble.
Warren Buffett has reacted with apathy to the news that Justin Sun has cancelled his steak lunch with him.
Sun, founder of the Tron blockchain project, paid millions of dollars in a charity auction for the chance to eat a meal with Buffett, who has been openly hostile towards bitcoin and blockchain technology. In an interview, Buffett said he was ‘not that bothered’ about missing the event, which he had been looking forward to ‘not even slightly’.
Early reports indicated that Sun was suffering from kidney stones, though these later proved inaccurate. ‘To be honest, when he told me about his health issues, I assumed he’d been eating rat poison squared,’ explained Buffett. ‘He was going to tell me all about his business, which is called Turd or Tron or something. Apparently it’s named after a movie, which is another kind of new technology – kind of like a moving picture with music and words and stuff. They’re pretty new – they didn’t have them around when I was a kid.’
Reports later emerged in the Chinese media that Sun had been detained by the Chinese authorities on suspicion of raising money illegally, money laundering, and facilitating gambling and pornography transactions. While free, Sun was not permitted to leave mainland China. ‘I knew it!’ commented Buffett. ‘All this bit corn stuff is bound to end in tears. These cryptic currencies are only ever used for criminal activity like money laundering and gambling. Pornography is a new one on me – apparently that’s some new kind of thing involving photographs of people with no clothes on. I don’t know a lot about that – back in my day, when you took your film to the chemist to develop, they wouldn’t print anything with naked people in it. I’ve heard it’s quite popular though.’
The price of Tron fell by 20% at one point. However, Justin Sun then turned up safe and well in San Francisco – showing that the reports in the Chinese media were false. Nevertheless, Sun’s lunch with Buffett is still on hold, pending but of uncertain status, like a transaction stuck in mempool waiting for confirmation.
‘Look, I don’t know what’s going on,’ complained Buffett. ‘I mean, there’s a lot of weird stuff that’s been happening recently. Like they have these big metal things that can fly, even though they’re heavier than air, and you can talk to people in other places over this device called a “wireless”. Maybe this whole Justin thing is something to do with that. Or with the “Internet”, which is like some kind of big spiderweb or something. Apparently you can get pornography on it. I don’t know.’
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